Why all the "hoopla" over our adoption of Isaac? Are we trying to make ourselves look saintly?
Why all of a sudden is a private introvert like me advertising her life on a blog and even joining Facebook? There are 2 reasons.
The first reason is a matter of practicality. International adoption is expensive -- over $30,000. There are fees to the adoption agency, fees to China, travel fees, homestudy fees, and many other miscellaneous expenses. We have several fundraisers going. Facebook, letters, and blogs are some of the ways we can let friends and family know we need their support. It is hard to ask for help sometimes and God has definitely worked on my pride through this experience. Prayers and money are always appreciated :) We still need about $5000 dollars. Although our travel time is getting close, I know God has a plan to provide.
The other reason I have stepped outside my comfort zone (Facebook? Really? I would have never thought!) is that maybe in sharing our story, someone else might be encouraged to open their home to a child without a family. There are so many...
God has taught me so much about obedience, trust and hope through this adoption journey. I'm sure His lessons will continue after Isaac comes home. Thanks be to God!
Friday, April 19, 2013
Acceptance
I guess it really wouldn't have mattered what we had discovered about his special need. He had already stolen our hearts. We sent a "letter of intent to adopt" to China and we were pre-approved two weeks later. It was now the beginning of October and it was very exciting to finally have a face to put with our son.
I suppose now would be a good time to explain Isaac's name. Obviously his name in China is not Isaac. It is Zhi'an (pronounced Jerron in English). The meaning of Isaac is laughter. I feel like smiling every time I think of how God has grown our family in ways I could never have imagined as a young woman. Most Chinese children want an American name when they are adopted. Since we can not ask him ahead of time what his preference is (paperwork is required from China with their new American name), we have decided to name him Isaac Zhi'an. That way he can decide for himself after we get home.
After our pre-approval, we were encouraged to send him a care package of treats, toys, pictures, or whatever we thought would be beneficial. I really struggled with this idea. It wasn't that I didn't want to send him things, but I worried that if we sent things too early and then he sat around waiting for us to come, he might think we had changed our minds. Nine months is a long time for a child! In the end, we ended up sending a photo album of our family, a bag of BlowPops to share, and a puzzle.
We also received an update on Isaac after the pre-approval. He is exactly the same size as Leanna, loves dogs and likes to play darts. Just an ordinary boy who needs a family and needs a blood transfusion every 3 weeks.
I know there will be challenges. I know there will be tears and tantrums. I know there will be pain in the assimilation process. But I also know there will be God -- and He is good and He has big plans. I can trust Him and rest in the knowledge of His love for me and my family.
I suppose now would be a good time to explain Isaac's name. Obviously his name in China is not Isaac. It is Zhi'an (pronounced Jerron in English). The meaning of Isaac is laughter. I feel like smiling every time I think of how God has grown our family in ways I could never have imagined as a young woman. Most Chinese children want an American name when they are adopted. Since we can not ask him ahead of time what his preference is (paperwork is required from China with their new American name), we have decided to name him Isaac Zhi'an. That way he can decide for himself after we get home.
After our pre-approval, we were encouraged to send him a care package of treats, toys, pictures, or whatever we thought would be beneficial. I really struggled with this idea. It wasn't that I didn't want to send him things, but I worried that if we sent things too early and then he sat around waiting for us to come, he might think we had changed our minds. Nine months is a long time for a child! In the end, we ended up sending a photo album of our family, a bag of BlowPops to share, and a puzzle.
We also received an update on Isaac after the pre-approval. He is exactly the same size as Leanna, loves dogs and likes to play darts. Just an ordinary boy who needs a family and needs a blood transfusion every 3 weeks.
I know there will be challenges. I know there will be tears and tantrums. I know there will be pain in the assimilation process. But I also know there will be God -- and He is good and He has big plans. I can trust Him and rest in the knowledge of His love for me and my family.
Monday, April 15, 2013
Isaac's need
Isaac has a blood disease called thalassemia. His bone marrow makes deformed red blood cells, so he needs a blood transfusion once every 3 or 4 weeks. In addition to that, he receives chealation therapy which involves taking a pill everyday to help draw out excess iron in his blood. Scientists are working on a cure for thalassemia and have successfully cured a few people with bone marrow transplants. It is still very risky and requires a perfect sibling match.
His disease is very expensive to treat, but insurance is helpful. Although his first month home will be filled with all kinds of doctor appointments, we should settle down to a routine that is not too intrusive in our daily life. He has no restrictions on his activities and he likes to play like all 10- year- old boys. We will have to watch our consumption of iron-rich foods. Red meat and packaged cereal are the biggest foods to cut back. That will be good for everyone!
His biggest special need is the same as yours and mine -- he needs someone to love him and tell him about the Father and his Son.
His disease is very expensive to treat, but insurance is helpful. Although his first month home will be filled with all kinds of doctor appointments, we should settle down to a routine that is not too intrusive in our daily life. He has no restrictions on his activities and he likes to play like all 10- year- old boys. We will have to watch our consumption of iron-rich foods. Red meat and packaged cereal are the biggest foods to cut back. That will be good for everyone!
His biggest special need is the same as yours and mine -- he needs someone to love him and tell him about the Father and his Son.
Saturday, April 13, 2013
Finding Isaac
I know these posts are moving at a fast pace, but we are playing catch-up. September 2012 was full of big decisions. We had chosen the country of China already and now it was time to look at the real faces of lots of little boys. Some people have asked, "Why China, when there are so many children right here in the U.S.?" It's a fair question with no clear answer. First of all, we felt like that was where God led us. Our first adoption journey was a domestic adoption and it was a fabulous experience. This time, China seemed the most practical choice. God didn't send anyone knocking on our doorstep. Instead, we'll be doing the knocking this time. The travel requirements, the age requirements, and the adoption process for China fit our needs.
Have you ever looked on adoption sites like Rainbowkids? It is a very overwhelming experience. So many children with so many needs. Most of all, they just need someone to love them and call them "my child." How would we ever know which one God had chosen for us? The weight of this decision was weighing heavy on my heart.
Leanna and I were looking on Lifeline's special focus list (a list for kids who have been available for a long time and not yet chosen) one day when we came across the face of a boy who looked about Leanna's age. His eyes seemed to come out of his picture and look right at me. It felt like he was speaking to me. There were 2 videos under his picture, so Leanna and I watched them. In the first video, he seemed like a very nervous and fidgety boy who didn't want to be the focus of attention (he sings a very cute little song though :) . The 2nd video had him showing off a picture he had drawn. It was a picture of a family standing beside a house. Leanna said, "Look mom, the house has stairs, just like ours. I think he might be the one."
I believed she was right. It was time to research his "special need."
Have you ever looked on adoption sites like Rainbowkids? It is a very overwhelming experience. So many children with so many needs. Most of all, they just need someone to love them and call them "my child." How would we ever know which one God had chosen for us? The weight of this decision was weighing heavy on my heart.
Leanna and I were looking on Lifeline's special focus list (a list for kids who have been available for a long time and not yet chosen) one day when we came across the face of a boy who looked about Leanna's age. His eyes seemed to come out of his picture and look right at me. It felt like he was speaking to me. There were 2 videos under his picture, so Leanna and I watched them. In the first video, he seemed like a very nervous and fidgety boy who didn't want to be the focus of attention (he sings a very cute little song though :) . The 2nd video had him showing off a picture he had drawn. It was a picture of a family standing beside a house. Leanna said, "Look mom, the house has stairs, just like ours. I think he might be the one."
I believed she was right. It was time to research his "special need."
Thursday, April 11, 2013
He didn't say no ...
Bill didn't say no. He said "I'll pray about it." The waiting lasted for about 3 months and on Valentine's Day 2012, I received the most loving homemade card ever. It had two words on it -- I'm ready. We applied to Lifeline Children's Services and began our homestudy in March.
One of the requirements for potential adoptive parents is to write your life story. There are guidelines to follow and it is very intensive. Definitely a trip down "memory lane." I remember thinking how hard it must be for Bill to write his story with both of his parents having passed away in the last year and a half. Then, on April 13th (one week after we turned in our life stories) my father died unexpectly of a heart attack. It was a very hard time for me and I'm so thankful to have a God who will carry me when I'm feeling weak.
Another part of our homestudy was a health assessment. Bill and I are fairly healthy people, so we breezed through our check-ups. Bill, being 52 years old, was reminded that he was 2 years over due for the "dreaded colonoscopy." He figured he might as well get it over with because there wouldn't be much time for that after a child came home. The homestudy was complete and we were waiting for the final draft when Bill had his colonoscopy. Imagine our surprise when the doctor came out to tell me he had found a cancerous tumor that needed to be removed as soon as possible. Bill had no symptoms and probably would not have had this procedure done if not for the adoption process. I believe Isaac may have saved Bill's life. The cancer was caught early, removed, and he is cancer-free. Praise God!
In August our homestudy was complete and we were approved for a special-neeeds boy between the ages of 5-10 years old. The search was on!
.
One of the requirements for potential adoptive parents is to write your life story. There are guidelines to follow and it is very intensive. Definitely a trip down "memory lane." I remember thinking how hard it must be for Bill to write his story with both of his parents having passed away in the last year and a half. Then, on April 13th (one week after we turned in our life stories) my father died unexpectly of a heart attack. It was a very hard time for me and I'm so thankful to have a God who will carry me when I'm feeling weak.
Another part of our homestudy was a health assessment. Bill and I are fairly healthy people, so we breezed through our check-ups. Bill, being 52 years old, was reminded that he was 2 years over due for the "dreaded colonoscopy." He figured he might as well get it over with because there wouldn't be much time for that after a child came home. The homestudy was complete and we were waiting for the final draft when Bill had his colonoscopy. Imagine our surprise when the doctor came out to tell me he had found a cancerous tumor that needed to be removed as soon as possible. Bill had no symptoms and probably would not have had this procedure done if not for the adoption process. I believe Isaac may have saved Bill's life. The cancer was caught early, removed, and he is cancer-free. Praise God!
In August our homestudy was complete and we were approved for a special-neeeds boy between the ages of 5-10 years old. The search was on!
.
Wednesday, April 3, 2013
The Beginning...
Most people begin their adoption blogs at the beginning of their journey. I'm a little behind the times -- no surprise to those who know me. We are already logged in with China and have been pre-approved for a 10 year old boy named Zhi'an. This first blog will be long because I am taking you waaaay back to the beginning of our adoption stories (yes, more than one). Bear with me, and I promise future posts will not be quite so long!
Our adoption story began about 20 years ago when the youngest of our 4 older children was about 2 years old. For some unknown and crazy reason God planted in my heart the desire for another child. I know it doesn't make sense to most people -- I already had 4 children under the age of 10. But, the longing was there.
While I was pregnant with Troy (the 4th baby), Bill and I endured many supposedly humorous and sometimes snide comments from friends and strangers alike. "Don't you know what causes this?" was just one remark we must have heard a hundred times. Being young ( I was 27) and not as strong in my faith, I let others suck the joy and pride I should have felt right out of me. When the doctor suggested I have my tubes tied, I agreed. My girlhood dream of a large family was accomplished, and apparently I needed to stop having babies.
So what did I do with my new heart's desire? Why, I kept it a secret of course! I didn't want anyone to think I had flipped my lid. I didn't even tell my husband. The only one I dared discuss it with was the one who had placed it in my heart to begin with. My secret was safe with Him! My prayer went kind of like this:
God, I know nothing is impossible with you. If you want our family to grow, you will provide. I also know there are consequences for our actions (having my tubes tied), but I also know your mercies are neverending. I know you hear my prayer and I'll just wait for your answer (but can you please hurry up, I'm not getting any younger).
I know some of you are thinking, "Why didn't you just get your tubes untied?" Well, remember I still hadn't told my husband how I felt (I know, I should have). Bill was living life and loving it and he seemed 100% happy with the way things were. Basically, I was chicken. So each year and sometimes each month I just continued my prayer, "I'm still waiting...I'm still believing...".
God had plans -- big plans. He let us in on them in June of 2003, and in October of that same year Leanna joined our family in a way that only God could have orchestrated. Her story is amazing, but not the one we're focusing on right now. God had answered my prayers in a better way than I could have imagined, and I thought our family was finally complete. God was looking down and snickering. For 8 years I enjoyed raising Leanna as a kind-of only child (the others were about grown) -- much different than having 4 stair-step kids. But then, out of no where it happened. THE LONGING. My immediate reaction was, "Oh no, I lost my mind. I landed on the other side of menopause without my brain!" Then I heard God's voice. It sounded strangely like Leanna, and it said "sure would be nice if I had someone to do my schoolwork with." O.K. I heard you... This time I did share with Bill what I felt God was saying and thus the beginning of our journey to Isaac.
Our adoption story began about 20 years ago when the youngest of our 4 older children was about 2 years old. For some unknown and crazy reason God planted in my heart the desire for another child. I know it doesn't make sense to most people -- I already had 4 children under the age of 10. But, the longing was there.
While I was pregnant with Troy (the 4th baby), Bill and I endured many supposedly humorous and sometimes snide comments from friends and strangers alike. "Don't you know what causes this?" was just one remark we must have heard a hundred times. Being young ( I was 27) and not as strong in my faith, I let others suck the joy and pride I should have felt right out of me. When the doctor suggested I have my tubes tied, I agreed. My girlhood dream of a large family was accomplished, and apparently I needed to stop having babies.
So what did I do with my new heart's desire? Why, I kept it a secret of course! I didn't want anyone to think I had flipped my lid. I didn't even tell my husband. The only one I dared discuss it with was the one who had placed it in my heart to begin with. My secret was safe with Him! My prayer went kind of like this:
God, I know nothing is impossible with you. If you want our family to grow, you will provide. I also know there are consequences for our actions (having my tubes tied), but I also know your mercies are neverending. I know you hear my prayer and I'll just wait for your answer (but can you please hurry up, I'm not getting any younger).
I know some of you are thinking, "Why didn't you just get your tubes untied?" Well, remember I still hadn't told my husband how I felt (I know, I should have). Bill was living life and loving it and he seemed 100% happy with the way things were. Basically, I was chicken. So each year and sometimes each month I just continued my prayer, "I'm still waiting...I'm still believing...".
God had plans -- big plans. He let us in on them in June of 2003, and in October of that same year Leanna joined our family in a way that only God could have orchestrated. Her story is amazing, but not the one we're focusing on right now. God had answered my prayers in a better way than I could have imagined, and I thought our family was finally complete. God was looking down and snickering. For 8 years I enjoyed raising Leanna as a kind-of only child (the others were about grown) -- much different than having 4 stair-step kids. But then, out of no where it happened. THE LONGING. My immediate reaction was, "Oh no, I lost my mind. I landed on the other side of menopause without my brain!" Then I heard God's voice. It sounded strangely like Leanna, and it said "sure would be nice if I had someone to do my schoolwork with." O.K. I heard you... This time I did share with Bill what I felt God was saying and thus the beginning of our journey to Isaac.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)